Turning fifty shades of red

May 9, 2012 By Carolyn B. Tyler, Staff Writer

Yes, I have read the best-selling book of "mommy porn" parodied over the weekend on "Saturday Night Live."

I enjoy reading.

Until recently I have primarily concentrated on biographies, but lately have found myself drawing from the New York Times Best Seller List and the recommendation of friends on fiction.

Normally, I wouldn't be hesitant to tell you my latest read was been the top three from the N.Y. Times fiction list -- unless you know that the "Fifty Shades of Grey" trilogy has been topping the list for weeks.

"Fifty Shades of Grey" has been tagged as "mommy porn." And it has been popular.

It was even the subject of a primary sketch on Saturday Night Live last Saturday. As depicted in that sketch, most of us are digesting the book on our electronic devices, so nobody can see what we are reading.

Actually it's a pretty good story. Of the three books, the last is the best. And the three could be condensed into one good movie or one excellent book -- it would just require editing with some crashing waves and fluttering curtains replacing the explicit sex scenes. Over the three books you become adept at skimming four pages a time as the sex becomes redundant.

And nobody admits to anybody else that they are reading "Fifty Shades" -- until I tell you here today that I have finished all three.

As I say, I have relied upon friends for book recommendations. I haven't received any for a while, and then, slowly, it came out many of my women friends were reading "Fifty Shades."

I said, "Laters" to someone and their muttered response was, "You must be reading 'Grey.'"

Subtly I am discovering many people near, dear, and afar are reading "Fifty Shades."

But only now are we slowly beginning to reveal that and discuss it. Until now most of the discussion has been limited to daytime talk shows and very late night TV.

Personally I felt nothing for the primary characters. Nothing. I didn't care what happened to them. And that's not my usual reaction in a book. Most readers with whom I am gradually breaking the discussion barrier like her and are "intrigued" with him.

I have Simon Baker picked to play Christian Grey in the movie. I haven't cast the Ana Steele role. I can't decide if they should be drawn from the mainstream actors membership or the XXX-rated list.

But, since I know there are others out there sharing the same reading secret I've kept over the past couple of weeks, I admit to you here today that I am among the women readers best marked by Fifty Shades of Red.

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